Homeward Bound

You may notice some weird spacing and indentations in this post and the previous one. That's because blogger's servers are b0rked and won't let me log in. So I'm posting this via email.UPDATE: Thanks, John, for telling us how to fix this. But onto the business at hand...

The reservations are set. The tickets are bought. May 5th, 2005. I'm comin' home to you, St. Lou.

Sooner than you expected, wasn't it?

And once again, I can't sleep.

My new thing is that I feel guilty about leaving my job. Can you believe this crap? I guess I wouldn't be Jewish if I didn't feel guilty about something. Maybe I'd feel less guilty if they didn't give me a promotion only a month ago. But on the other hand, what kind of retarded promotion was it? They pay me more to do the same stupid shit? No additional responsibilities? It's like I'm ripping them off. They should be thanking me for leaving.

I guess another part of my guilt has to do with the fact that two other people in my unit are leaving as well. Things may get a bit short-staffed. But 5 new people also just joined the unit, so I guess it all evens out. Well, 4, actually ... one of 'em didn't pass the Series 6. But maybe he'll pass it when he takes it again in a month. And I assuage some of my guilt by reminding myself that some other poor sap will surely rise to take my place, providing another poor soul with a steady -- albeit soul-crushingly boring -- job.

I keep thinking about the final episode of M*A*S*H. Hawkeye and Hunnicut kept saying stuff about how torn they felt about leaving. On the one hand, they really hated being in Korea. On the other, they really liked each other and probably would never see each other again. So my situation is kinda like that. Except without the war stuff. And the doctor stuff. And Korea. Oh, and I am indifferent towards everyone I work with.

Okay, so M*A*S*H was a bad analogy.

I don't think I'd feel nearly as bad if I didn't know I was doing the right thing. That doesn't make any sense, does it? But it's true. If I didn't know that I had to get out of here, I wouldn't care what I was doing. But, as the voice in my dream said, "It's time to move on."

So, hopefully, I'll be able to go to sleep now. Thanks for listenin'.